大作文

　　第五檔范文 19分

　　As illustrated in the cartoon, each person sits in their own work room. In front of them is a computer. Everyone looks at the screen carefully, and communicate with their colleagues through the net instead of talking face to face. Their work places are placed like a net. And below the cartoon, there is a topic which says: the near and far among the Internet.

　　From the cartoon, we can conclude that the cartoonist wants to convey such a message: with the popularity of computers, people from all over the world become nearer by using the internet to communicate with each other. Meanwhile, people also become far away from their friends. All of us accept the fact that the development of the internet brings lots of conveniences to our daily life, for instance, we can buy a book on the net instead of going to a bookstore. Besides, we can communicate with our friends on the net without going out of home. But we can't ignore the other side of these: the time we spend with friends or family becomes less. And we hardly see them once in a week. It will make us feel lonely if we continue to use the tool on the net to talk with friends instead of talking with them on the phone or going out with them.

　　To my best understanding, we should use the net to communicate with each other in a proper way. It is just a tool when we really need it to serve us. If we want to keep our friendship more effectively, we should spend more time with them in our real life. Only in this way can we not only make full use of the communication tool on the net but also make our friendship stronger.

　　評(píng)語(yǔ)：該文很好地完成了試題規(guī)定的任務(wù)，內(nèi)容完整，既清楚描述了漫畫(huà)內(nèi)容又指出了其隱含的意思。語(yǔ)言流暢，措辭準(zhǔn)確，句型結(jié)構(gòu)有變化，有效使用了連接手段，內(nèi)容連貫，層次分明，文章易于理解，僅有個(gè)別語(yǔ)言錯(cuò)誤，字?jǐn)?shù)符合要求。

　　第四檔范文 15分

　　As is vividly depicted in the drawing above, we can see clearly that some people are very near by the computer while some people are much long with each other in the net world.

　　What is conveyed in the picture is most thought-provoking and worth discussing among people, especially the young people. It is a mirror, reflecting the relationships between the people are altering by the Internet. People's opinions differ greatly on this matter. Some people believe that the Internet is very convenient for people who are living in a longer distance to keep connection with each other. Others argue that the Internet make the people living in near areas meet very little. Still others hold that people's facing to face to communicate is reducing to a low level.

　　It struck me that if nothing is done to solve the social phenomenon, its effect will be soon shown, which inevitably affects the development of the harmonious society. So we should regard the trend rightly. We also should take it into our accounts strictly. We should use the Net more reasonably. On no account should we make the people longer by the computer. Only in this way can we have a good generation foreseen. And a more harmonious society can be built up.

　　評(píng)語(yǔ)：文章較好地完成了試題規(guī)定的任務(wù)，內(nèi)容比較完整，既描述了漫畫(huà)又揭示了隱含的意思，使用了比較豐富的句型結(jié)構(gòu)和詞語(yǔ)，使用了一定的連接手段，語(yǔ)言基本通順，文章結(jié)構(gòu)完整，層次清晰，易于理解，但是有一定數(shù)量的語(yǔ)言錯(cuò)誤。

　　第三檔范文 11分

　　As the picture vividly depict that internet like a net connect different people in the world. You can communicate with your friends. No matter where they live in, the distance no longer an obstacle in our communication.

　　The picture reflect a thought-provoking social phenomenon that people in a mounting numbers use internet shopping, work, study and chatting with friends in order to meet each other face and face. There are somewhat reasonable, but you weighing in mind, you can find that distance between our spirit longer than before. On the Internet we can not know each other very well, because some people don't use their real name, even tell lies on internet. On the conterary, if we meet each other face and face, it's better for communication.

　　Internet make the obstacle of distance vanished, benefit us a lot, we can chating with our friends who live in a city that far from us. However, we should take that serious internet make the distance of our spirit longer than before, internet is a double-edge sword.

　　評(píng)語(yǔ)：該文包含多數(shù)內(nèi)容要點(diǎn)；語(yǔ)法結(jié)構(gòu)與詞匯基本能夠滿足任務(wù)要求；有一些嚴(yán)重語(yǔ)法與用詞錯(cuò)誤，但不影響理解；內(nèi)容較連貫，層次較清晰。但是第三部分主要是對(duì)第二部分的總結(jié)，評(píng)論簡(jiǎn)單。

　　第二檔范文 7分

　　As can be seen from the picture, many people are sitting in the front of a computers, who are basing in typing on the keyboard, but they don't immediate communicate with each other though they live near. It looks like a bit pot, everyone has its space, and the computer is necessary for them.

　　It goes without saying that this picture aims at reavling a common phenomenon in our daily life, that is internet brings conviences to us, also brings the distance for each other. Nowadays, we must believe that our development can not leave the using of internet. We do any things through the computer instead of saying "hello" to our families or colleagues face to face.

　　In my opinion, we must realize the importance of the internet and also pay more attentions to communicate with each other face to face. Do not make the computer make a distant between us.

　　評(píng)語(yǔ)：該文遺漏題目要點(diǎn)，評(píng)論不夠恰當(dāng)，語(yǔ)言錯(cuò)誤多，有些句子內(nèi)容表達(dá)不清晰，字?jǐn)?shù)不夠。

　　第一檔范文 3分

　　Largely through the influence of many people from different points of the world. The old, the young and the student, they use the computers to constant with another body.

　　Some people use computer to leare new knowledge, such as the students. Some people use the computer to help them to complete their work. Such as the tank workers. While some people use the computer to play games. For example, some old person like to play game on computer.

　　Many people on computer is on Monday to Friday. But the player people is everyday more or less. So the world is like a family. Since the computer with us is to enable our to share in a common life we cannot help considering whether or not we are forming the powers of the life’s happy.

　　評(píng)語(yǔ)：該文明顯遺漏主要內(nèi)容，不能反映需要表達(dá)的觀點(diǎn)；語(yǔ)法與用詞錯(cuò)誤很多，妨礙理解，作者的語(yǔ)言運(yùn)用能力差；字?jǐn)?shù)不夠。

　　小作文

　　五檔，9分

　　Dear editor,

　　I'm a sincere reader of your newspaper and I like your discussion of the social problems. Now I want to give some opinions of myself about the "White Pollution"

　　As we know, regulation was made to solve the problem in June 1st of 2008. The use of plastic bags was restricted in the supermarket and many other shops freely. At the beginning, it was carried on well, but now I found plastic bags were used in some small shops for free or with no pay.

　　I am writing to tell you that we should solve this problem soon with the help of your newspaper. You could make some investigators about it and write some reports of it, so as to appeal to all the people’s attentions of our society.

　　Sincerely,

　　Li Ming

　　本文很好地完成了試題規(guī)定的任務(wù)，與目標(biāo)讀者完全產(chǎn)生了預(yù)期的效果：

　　1．內(nèi)容包含了所有的內(nèi)容要點(diǎn)，該文第一段的內(nèi)容更吻合題目的要求。

　　2．所使用的語(yǔ)法結(jié)構(gòu)和詞匯比較豐富。

　　3．語(yǔ)言比較自然流暢，盡管存在個(gè)別的語(yǔ)法（例如，時(shí)態(tài)）和用詞錯(cuò)誤。

　　4．有效使用了各種銜接手段，層次清晰，組織也比較嚴(yán)密。

　　5．格式與語(yǔ)域恰當(dāng)貼切。

　　四檔，7-8分

　　Dear Editor Wang,

　　I am a senior student living in Beijing. Being a citizen in our capital, I care a lot about our environment. But, although the law of not using plastic bags had been enforced since June, the effect is not very good. I am afraid 'White Pollution" will still exist for a long time.

　　I believe there are ways to improve the situation. Our communities could offer bags free, which will substitute plastic bags. Meanwhile, some education on environment and White pollution should be held to local people. Besides the above two, much more can be done. I hope you would consider it carefully.

　　Yours truly

　　Li Ming

　　較好地完成了試題規(guī)定的任務(wù)，基本能夠?qū)δ繕?biāo)讀者產(chǎn)生預(yù)期的效果：

　　1. 包含了所有的內(nèi)容要點(diǎn)，既簡(jiǎn)要介紹了自己的觀點(diǎn)，又提出了具體的建議。

　　2. 所使用的句子結(jié)構(gòu)和詞匯相對(duì)比較豐富，例如：Being a citizen in……, I care……等。

　　3. 語(yǔ)言基本正確，當(dāng)然也存在著一些語(yǔ)法錯(cuò)誤和用詞的錯(cuò)誤，但是并不會(huì)嚴(yán)重影響意義的表達(dá)。

　　4. 采用了適當(dāng)?shù)你暯邮侄危�例�? but, meanwhile, besides等，層次也比較清晰。

　　5. 格式和語(yǔ)域比較恰當(dāng)。

　　三檔，5-6分

　　To whom it may concern:

　　As a student of a university, I want to take this opportunity to express some points about "White Pollution".

　　There is no denying that plastic is destroy our environment is we use it excessively. So the government take some means to deal with it. Restrict to use the plastic bags in whole country. But it didn't get successful as we predict. The "White Pollution" is still around our environment in some regions.

　　Takes measures is needed. I want to take some recommends. First and formost, more strength restriction is needed by pollution education. Second, media should spread more information concern. Only in this way can we curb the statement. I'm looking forward your reply.

　　Sincerely yours

　　Liming

　　基本完成了試題規(guī)定的任務(wù)，對(duì)目標(biāo)讀者基本產(chǎn)生了預(yù)期的效果：

　　1. 內(nèi)容包含試題所要求的兩個(gè)要點(diǎn)，沒(méi)有跑題。

　　2. 具有較多的用詞與語(yǔ)法錯(cuò)誤，但是讀者仍然能夠大致領(lǐng)會(huì)作者想要表達(dá)的意思。

　　3. 采用了一些簡(jiǎn)單的銜接手段，內(nèi)容還算連貫，層次也算清楚。

　　4. 格式和語(yǔ)域基本合理。

　　二檔，3-4分

　　I am very sorry to trouble with you. But this is a problem annoying with me. It is White Pollution. With the economic growth widely, white pollution become more and more serious. It is harmonious between the men and nature. White pollution destroy some special. More and more similar issue can be read today in newspaper as well as in magazine.

　　The problem can be solved in some ways. First, attitude is everything. We must make people aware of this issue. Second, we must change with ourself. It's essential that we address our problem before looking to others change. Finally, the acts of pollution must be punishment.

　　I'm looking forward to your reply!

　　Yours sincerely

　　Li Ming

　　未能按照要求完成試題規(guī)定的任務(wù)，不能清楚地將信息傳達(dá)給讀者。

　　1．第一段落的內(nèi)容離題太遠(yuǎn)，未能很好地表達(dá)題目的第一個(gè)內(nèi)容要點(diǎn)。

　　2．語(yǔ)法和用詞錯(cuò)誤太多，表明作者缺乏基本的英語(yǔ)語(yǔ)法知識(shí)或者使用語(yǔ)法知識(shí)的能力。

　　3．雖然也使用了一些銜接手段，但是內(nèi)容上缺乏連貫性。

　　4．格式和語(yǔ)域不恰當(dāng)。例如，此信沒(méi)有抬頭。

　　一檔，1-2分

　　Dear the editor

　　I'm pleasure to write the letter to you. With the development of the socity, white pollution is more and more bad. Our sky is not blue, our earth is not clean and our river is not fish.

　　To solve this question, I have some suggestions. First, every one drive their car less a day in a week than before. Second, when we are shopping, we use environment plastic bags. Third, our government do some rules. Do you thing my opinion? Look forward your reply.

　　Yours faithfully,

　　Li Ming

　　未完成試題規(guī)定的任務(wù)，不能把信息傳遞給讀者：

　　1．文章內(nèi)容基本離題，有許多不相關(guān)的內(nèi)容。

　　2．作者基本不具備英語(yǔ)的語(yǔ)法常識(shí)，句子結(jié)構(gòu)簡(jiǎn)單且不完整。

　　3．用詞錯(cuò)誤太多，詞不達(dá)意。

　　零檔 0 分

　　dear editor:

　　I am a student of Tianjing University. Recently years our country

　　所傳達(dá)的信息或者所用的語(yǔ)言太少，內(nèi)容與要求也無(wú)關(guān)系，無(wú)法評(píng)價(jià)