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同等學(xué)力英語作文批改:第93期

來源:育路教育網(wǎng) 時間:2011-07-01 15:23:18

  同等學(xué)力英語作文原文

  There is a growing tendency these days for many people who live in countryside to come into and work in city . This problem has caused wide public concern in most cities all over the world. An investigation shows that many emigrants think that working at city provides them with not only a higher salary but also the opportunity of learning new skills.
  
  Although mang emigrants contribute to the economic growth of the city,they may inevitably bring about many negative impacts.The experts point out that in increasing many people come into and work in city are putting pressure on population control and social order and that they have worsened traffic and public health problems.
  
  As far as my concern,government should be make efforts to reduce the increasing gap between cities and countryside.They ought to set aside an appropriate fund for improvement of the standard of peasants's lives.They should invite some experts in agriculture to share their experiences information and knowledge with peasants which will coutribute to the economic growth of countryside.

  點(diǎn)評:7-8分

  文章結(jié)構(gòu)不盡合理,主要原因是沒有認(rèn)真審題,題目要求的段是寫總述有問題,第二段寫主要問題,第三段是發(fā)表自己的觀點(diǎn),但是你的文章好像有與題目不吻合的嫌疑。一定要認(rèn)真審題,注意語言表達(dá)和具體的語法錯誤,加油啊。多看看范文。

結(jié)束

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