同等學(xué)力英語作文原文

　　There is no denying the fact that city problem is a hotly debated topic in China today. Reports are often heard about population and pressure resoulting from city problem. Actually, the  phenomenon has been so widespread that it has caused nationwide concern.

　　A number of factors might have led to this problem, but the following are the critical ones. In the first place, growing population is cause problem of mankind who need more food. Besides the noise and rubbish of people are sources of pollution. In the second place, the boom of chinese economy in the past decades has brought about a lot of employment pressure in this country. Last but not least,by city problem, ones may increase the distance between the poor and the rich.

　　Personally, I believe that we should not go to extrems on this matter. We may find out a balance of country and population. And it is my belief that only by placing man and society on an equal basis can we expect to have a lively and colorful word.

　　點(diǎn)評：7-8分

　　文章的大方向能夠把握住，但是結(jié)構(gòu)和題目并不是完全符合，題目要求段寫現(xiàn)象產(chǎn)生問題，第二段描述具體問題，第三段自己的 想法。可是你的段和第二段并沒有完全按照這個(gè)要求來寫，起碼老師不能明顯的看出這些關(guān)鍵詞。其實(shí)你只要稍作改動就是一篇不錯(cuò)的文章，一定要在動筆之前認(rèn)真審題以保證不跑題。加油啊，今后多看看范文，學(xué)習(xí)結(jié)構(gòu)安排和語言表達(dá)方面的技巧。