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同等學(xué)力英語(yǔ)作文批改:第101期

來(lái)源:育路教育網(wǎng) 時(shí)間:2011-07-01 15:31:30

  同等學(xué)力英語(yǔ)作文原文

  We could have not failed to notice the fact that an increasing number of rural people come to big cities to hunt some temporary work to afford their family` s life. Obviously, as so many people come to big cities, a series problem has arisen along.

  A number of factors might have led to these problems, but the following are the most critical ones. In the first place, because of those people who come to big cities to work are most young couples. And their children have to go with them to study in the city they work in. However, since they are not residents of the city, the poor kids are not allowed to go to the public primary school for free tuition. In the second place, the people who come from countryside have not medical insurance in the city. So, when they catch some emergent disease, they have to go to the hospital as soon as possible while they should afford the medical fee by themselves.

  To our relief, however, there is the trend that the government has noticed these problems. They are setting to build some school for those children living with their parents who come to the city for a temporary work. Nevertheless, I believe that there still are more to be done. For one thing, maybe the rural kids living in the city can go to the public school which set up for the city children, so that they can be educated with better condition. For another, some laws and regulations should be made to solve the problem of medical insurance. The laws should be supposed that those rural workers who were treated in city hospitals can be paid in their hometown by the medical fee tickets. For these ways, I am reasonable believe that the problems come from the mass of rural workers will fewer and fewer.

  點(diǎn)評(píng):9分

  文章的大體方向能夠把握住,但是第二段是要求你敘述具體的問(wèn)題,可是你第二段的開(kāi)頭卻是找原因。這明顯就是在套用模板,沒(méi)有具體問(wèn)題具體分析。動(dòng)筆之前一定要認(rèn)真審題,以免出現(xiàn)跑題現(xiàn)象。另外注意語(yǔ)法錯(cuò)誤和語(yǔ)言表達(dá)的技巧。加油啊。

結(jié)束

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